Damn, this last weekend I bought my 17 year old brother cigarettes. I should have stuck to my guns and never bought them for him. It's illegal yeah but it's also super bad for health.
And mum just called and said she talked to the police. He got caught smoking at school. Dumbass. Mum has talways told him not to smoke at school.
Oh yeah and mum got all sassy with the police and told them to find the damn person who gives the young cigarettes and fine them. And when she hung up she remembered she had bought that packet for him. lol
Tuesday, May 30, 2017
Scaring the grays away
And this is the result:
Also our garden got a makerover after years:
Monday, May 29, 2017
Biology
Okay, I'll try to get into uni this year again :D
I'm fucking crazy. Maybe it'll all work out this time.
Biology.
I'm fucking crazy. Maybe it'll all work out this time.
Biology.
Friday, May 26, 2017
still salty af
Okay, there were these people in the street dressed all nice and stuff, trying to talk to people. I thought they were selling something so I just rode past them on my bike.
Then later when I was going home they stopped me. Omg, the dude was so cute. He talked to me with that weird accent. And obviously that's why he was cute. Cause he wasn't estonian. Like I love my people, but we're an ugly bunch.
And to my disappointment he wanted to talk to me about jesus. Fuck! So cute but so messed up. He asked me why I wasn't interested in religion and I said I've seen what it does to people. And then, we were talking in estonian and I asked him if he'd prefer to talk in english "so it would be easier for him". He laughed and asked me if I wanted to practice mine and he was alright talking in estonian cause he was good enough. Like he probably was but I feel bad saying this, I just didn't understand much cause of his accent. The bits I did understand were great, he could really pull a sentence together not stumble and mumble but his accent was pretty bad. So when I asked if he wanted to do it in english I meant "sorry dude, I don't understand your accent". :D
I just didn't have the heart to tell him that cause as I said when I did understand him he was great and he was nice in general. Eventhough he wanted to talk about jesus.
And before that I had been at my mum's workplace and was on her computer. I saw a woman coming towards the cash register so I moved away so mum could serve her. I just wandered off looking at stuff in the shop. Then as I thought they were finishing the payment I walked back up, closer and I'm pretty sure the woman was my bully in high school. :D I kept my distance and stared at her to be sure.
She bought a broom and some little item. When she left the shop I walked up to my mum and said, "I think that was the girl who used to bully me in high school. You should have taken the broom stick and shove it up her ass". Damn, still salty af.
Then later when I was going home they stopped me. Omg, the dude was so cute. He talked to me with that weird accent. And obviously that's why he was cute. Cause he wasn't estonian. Like I love my people, but we're an ugly bunch.
And to my disappointment he wanted to talk to me about jesus. Fuck! So cute but so messed up. He asked me why I wasn't interested in religion and I said I've seen what it does to people. And then, we were talking in estonian and I asked him if he'd prefer to talk in english "so it would be easier for him". He laughed and asked me if I wanted to practice mine and he was alright talking in estonian cause he was good enough. Like he probably was but I feel bad saying this, I just didn't understand much cause of his accent. The bits I did understand were great, he could really pull a sentence together not stumble and mumble but his accent was pretty bad. So when I asked if he wanted to do it in english I meant "sorry dude, I don't understand your accent". :D
I just didn't have the heart to tell him that cause as I said when I did understand him he was great and he was nice in general. Eventhough he wanted to talk about jesus.
And before that I had been at my mum's workplace and was on her computer. I saw a woman coming towards the cash register so I moved away so mum could serve her. I just wandered off looking at stuff in the shop. Then as I thought they were finishing the payment I walked back up, closer and I'm pretty sure the woman was my bully in high school. :D I kept my distance and stared at her to be sure.
She bought a broom and some little item. When she left the shop I walked up to my mum and said, "I think that was the girl who used to bully me in high school. You should have taken the broom stick and shove it up her ass". Damn, still salty af.
Thursday, May 25, 2017
the colour of anxiety and depression
My mum's always going on about dying my hair. And I'm always like no, leave me alone, my hair's fine. And today in perfect lighting I saw the reality. My head is full of gray hairs. Like for real. Much, much, much more than my 54 year old mother's head.
Anyway, I won't be going to my mum's place this weekend, maybe next weekend and I will be dying my hair. Next friday she should come over to my place so I'll get her to buy me a hairdye which I pick out myself and I will dye the fuck out of my hair. I was fucking horrified this morning!
Tuesday, May 23, 2017
blind
Being too enlightened will make you blind. Or it's just another Bermuda triangle, making the weak ones lose their hearts, minds and sense of humanity.
Sunday, May 21, 2017
Fuck! What is this? Ughhh.
Okay yeah so friday was a bitch ass horrible day. Went and did my work on saturday. Felt pretty okay. Then today was fine too. Til now. Have a fever again and this wobbly, unsteady feeling, even sitting down on the bed. Fuck! What is this? Ughhh.
I dunno, like is it cause I'm trying to go off of Olanzapine? I know it's uncommon to get a fever with the pill or anxiety, but like.... ???? Yesterday was fine and the whole day of today, why now!?
Have no clue what is wrong with me. I just feel weak, poorly and nauseous.
And when I strain a bit my head gets weird, like I have a headcold. But if I'm just sitting, I don't have that headcold feeling.
I dunno, like is it cause I'm trying to go off of Olanzapine? I know it's uncommon to get a fever with the pill or anxiety, but like.... ???? Yesterday was fine and the whole day of today, why now!?
Have no clue what is wrong with me. I just feel weak, poorly and nauseous.
And when I strain a bit my head gets weird, like I have a headcold. But if I'm just sitting, I don't have that headcold feeling.
Friday, May 19, 2017
Will do it tomorrow
Ha! I'm sick. Won't be going to work today. Will do it tomorrow.
Damn, I almost lasted a year without skipping a day. But I did some
extra days, on my days off so this one time is okay since I'll do the
needed work on my day off tomorrow.
Luckily my supervisor said it was okay. I also called into the shop and asked the man I talk to most if it was okay if I did my work tomorrow. He said it shouldn't be a problem. I was gonna go in and empty the bins on the first floor and do the first floor/customer toilets but I asked if the woman who cleans the garage part could empty the four little toilet bins cause I've closed doors for her and cleaned toilets for her when she couldn't come in before.
I took a flu pill now, maybe I'll feel okay enough to go do the toilets myself, we'll see.
Yeah, for three days now I've had random anxiety and I was like fuck! It's the withdrawal symptoms. But yeah, luckily I decided to take my temperature and found out I have a fever. It's this fucking spring man! I mean I feel like shit but at least it's not anxiety related. And it's common for me to have anxiety when something else is wrong with my body. As long as it's not anxiety related I'm happy.
And I wanna post stuff about my last weekend when I went to mum's for the first time since october last year but I'm a lazy fuck.
Luckily my supervisor said it was okay. I also called into the shop and asked the man I talk to most if it was okay if I did my work tomorrow. He said it shouldn't be a problem. I was gonna go in and empty the bins on the first floor and do the first floor/customer toilets but I asked if the woman who cleans the garage part could empty the four little toilet bins cause I've closed doors for her and cleaned toilets for her when she couldn't come in before.
I took a flu pill now, maybe I'll feel okay enough to go do the toilets myself, we'll see.
Yeah, for three days now I've had random anxiety and I was like fuck! It's the withdrawal symptoms. But yeah, luckily I decided to take my temperature and found out I have a fever. It's this fucking spring man! I mean I feel like shit but at least it's not anxiety related. And it's common for me to have anxiety when something else is wrong with my body. As long as it's not anxiety related I'm happy.
And I wanna post stuff about my last weekend when I went to mum's for the first time since october last year but I'm a lazy fuck.
Wednesday, May 17, 2017
True story
I legitimately just cooked for two hours. True story. This just means I'm out of money and can't afford to buy ready meals.
Monday, May 15, 2017
no lattes anymore, ever
Ugh, the day started so good and then I had a latte. Yeah, no lattes anymore, ever.
Thursday, May 11, 2017
And I even said,"I bet something turns to shit now cause it always does" and seeeee? It did!
Okay, I think I ight get fired. I pissed off my supervisor today. I just felt like I was treated unfairly and was being used and I tried to talk to her and she snapped at me saying she doesn't wanna hear it cause she has enough problems. She asked me to cover for the girl that cleans during the day and I said I didn't wanna cause she wouldn't cover for me the last time. The first time she went to some model casting during her work hours and I had to cover for her. Then a couple of days later I wanted a day off to go to my borther's 9th grade graduation. Yeah nobody could be found to cover for me so I couldn't go cause you know... model casting is a lot more serious, like having a job interview for another position during your work hours when someone else is covering for you is a lot more important and deserves a day off.
Then I told my supervisor I didn't wanna do it for the girl anymore cause of that. And then my supervisor told me I would be doing it for her not the girl. So I reluctantly agreed. Only cause of the money.
By the end of the day I had so much anger in me that I just had to call her and tell her how I felt. This time the girl needed a day off cause one of her kids got sick. Okay. Thing is, I was sick twice this winter and asked for days off, my supervisor didn't accommodate. And now some kid falls ill and I have to accomodate? For the woman who didn't let me go to my little brother's graduation?
Why is her kid more important than my little brother? Why is the kid's health more important than mine?
My supervisor said that they don't even have to give days off but that she does accommodate sometimes. Okay, how is it okay to have a worker go on a job interview for another position during her work hours? Like and when I'm sick and ask for a day off, it's not important?
And then my supervisor just was like "well, don't come tomorrow then". I dunno if she meant to cover for the girl or at all. I mean I will go in in the evening and do my own part cause I haven't done anything wrong.
Yeah and I've talked about this before whenever I say something is good it gets fucked. And it happened today. I had lunch today with mum and I told her I love my job cause the people and my boss are normal. And I even said,"I bet something turns to shit now cause it always does" and seeeee? It did!
A good thing hopefully is that my new laptop thing almost got sorted today. I have to go in tomorrow with mum and sign the new contract and hopefully it'll be done and well this time.
Also, when mum was over last time, we ordered some things off the internet. One thing was a phone case. And it arrived today and looked so lovely. And they're super cheap. I looked at some for my phone today. Mum should come over in two weeks so hopefully we'll get to order stuff again.
Also, I went to wash my bike today in the manual car wash. Yeah there was a gap/slot for some partner card thingy or gift card and I'm stupid and stuck a coin in there :D So embarrassing! Whoever went in there after me definitely thought some complete idiot was there before them. And they'd be right. I went to check the wash in the evening to see if the coin was gone cause I felt bad about "breaking" it. It seemed to be gone.
Oh yeah and I sent out some CVs on those job hunt sites. Just in case.
Oh and I got to use my bike bell today for the first time. Like purposefully. Yeah, I tingled it at some woman when I went across the bridge. They delivered my mum's bag in the wrong post office, had to go across the bridge to fetch it.
Yeah and went to the bike shop to get my bike stand fixed so it wouldn't hit the spokes. The nut or whatever was rusted shut so they put some oil or something on it, have to go back in a few days, maybe we can get it off then. And I plan on changing my break pads aswell sometime this month hopefully.
Oh and today/yesterday I'm officially on 1,25mg of Olanzapine ever 2 days. Last year this time I was on 10mg a day.
The reading thing I complained about must be from my pill or withdrawal. Also I smak, suck and lick my lips like crazy. They're so dry. Definitely the pill or withdrawal again.
Ughhh.... I hope I won't be fired and my supervisor calms down.
Then I told my supervisor I didn't wanna do it for the girl anymore cause of that. And then my supervisor told me I would be doing it for her not the girl. So I reluctantly agreed. Only cause of the money.
By the end of the day I had so much anger in me that I just had to call her and tell her how I felt. This time the girl needed a day off cause one of her kids got sick. Okay. Thing is, I was sick twice this winter and asked for days off, my supervisor didn't accommodate. And now some kid falls ill and I have to accomodate? For the woman who didn't let me go to my little brother's graduation?
Why is her kid more important than my little brother? Why is the kid's health more important than mine?
My supervisor said that they don't even have to give days off but that she does accommodate sometimes. Okay, how is it okay to have a worker go on a job interview for another position during her work hours? Like and when I'm sick and ask for a day off, it's not important?
And then my supervisor just was like "well, don't come tomorrow then". I dunno if she meant to cover for the girl or at all. I mean I will go in in the evening and do my own part cause I haven't done anything wrong.
Yeah and I've talked about this before whenever I say something is good it gets fucked. And it happened today. I had lunch today with mum and I told her I love my job cause the people and my boss are normal. And I even said,"I bet something turns to shit now cause it always does" and seeeee? It did!
A good thing hopefully is that my new laptop thing almost got sorted today. I have to go in tomorrow with mum and sign the new contract and hopefully it'll be done and well this time.
Also, when mum was over last time, we ordered some things off the internet. One thing was a phone case. And it arrived today and looked so lovely. And they're super cheap. I looked at some for my phone today. Mum should come over in two weeks so hopefully we'll get to order stuff again.
Also, I went to wash my bike today in the manual car wash. Yeah there was a gap/slot for some partner card thingy or gift card and I'm stupid and stuck a coin in there :D So embarrassing! Whoever went in there after me definitely thought some complete idiot was there before them. And they'd be right. I went to check the wash in the evening to see if the coin was gone cause I felt bad about "breaking" it. It seemed to be gone.
Oh yeah and I sent out some CVs on those job hunt sites. Just in case.
Oh and I got to use my bike bell today for the first time. Like purposefully. Yeah, I tingled it at some woman when I went across the bridge. They delivered my mum's bag in the wrong post office, had to go across the bridge to fetch it.
Yeah and went to the bike shop to get my bike stand fixed so it wouldn't hit the spokes. The nut or whatever was rusted shut so they put some oil or something on it, have to go back in a few days, maybe we can get it off then. And I plan on changing my break pads aswell sometime this month hopefully.
Oh and today/yesterday I'm officially on 1,25mg of Olanzapine ever 2 days. Last year this time I was on 10mg a day.
The reading thing I complained about must be from my pill or withdrawal. Also I smak, suck and lick my lips like crazy. They're so dry. Definitely the pill or withdrawal again.
Ughhh.... I hope I won't be fired and my supervisor calms down.
Sunday, May 07, 2017
super livid
Since I'm super livid right now, and the emotion is fresh here I go....
It's about Miranda.
Right so on the 21st of april I bought a laptop online. It was a friday, next week on wednesday (april 26) it was delivered to the closest shop. I went to get it right away. And on saturday that week, april 29, I had to take it back to the store. It wasn't charging normally. I did ring the customer service a few times to talk about it and they were the ones who told me to take it to the shop, so I did.
The shop said, the problem seemed to be with the charger cause they used the charger they had in the shop and it was charging normally. They said they'd give me a new charger but it needed to be delivered from another shop. They said since I had the computer for such little time they'd replace it and not send it to warranty repair. Cool.
Then they ordered the new charger, the same type as my original one was. Thed charging problem maintained with the new one. They decided the laptop was the problem. They said they were gonna send it to warranty repair. I didn't agree. It was a new and expensive laptop and I wanted a new and working one, not a reapired thing. I said I only had it for three days and I want it replaced. They said, I'd have to make a new contract for the new one, that they wouldn't just replace it like the charger I guess.
That was all in the shop. We agreed in the shop that I'd send a message to customer service and see what they say. Oh and that weekend, I went to the shop 5 times cause when they said if they had any new information they'd call me. They never did, I had to go there cause I didn't have the shop's number.
Anyway, I got home and called customer service, told them the story. They told me to send it in in a letter to have a physical evidence of it all.
Got a reply from customer service. That dude said, they will replace but they don't have any of the same laptop's left. Okay.
By that time I was sure I didn't want Miranda anymore so I had to take the original laptop box back to the shop. When I got there I showed them the letter (I took a pic of it on my phone).
They were like, okay, let's finish the contract then. They gave me a paper to fill. Had to ride to my mum's workplace for her to sign it. And then ride back to the shop.
The thing is, there was another one of those laptops left. The shop dude had ordered it to my hometown for me and it was off the internet, so whoever checked didn't see it as available on there.
So the shop dude said, now we just have to wait til the laptop gets delivered.
I went home and rang the customer service dude cause he had said in the mail he was waiting for a reply from me. So I called, quicker.
I told him it was sorted, that the new laptop was coming. And he said that was news to him. So I told him there actually was one laptop left and it was ordered for me. He also said that the contract doesn't need to be ended, that the laptop would just be replaced. He said he'd call the shop for clarification and call me back.
So he called me back and said, they will just replace the laptop and no contract needs to be ended. So I told him we already did the contract thing and he said he'd call the shop and stop the contract annulment. I asked him like what was gonna happen now and he said that I just have to go to the shop and pick up the laptop when it arrives and don't have to do anything else.
Then!
Yesterday I called the shop to check if the laptop had arrived yet (cause as experience has shown, they don't contact me when they say they will). It hadn't. And the shop dude was going on about the annulment of the contract, like we have to wait for it or something. I didn't pay any mind to it cause I was told, I don't have to do anything and nothing will be annulled (by customer service).
Then today I discovered mum had received a confirmation of the annulment of the contract on her email. PLUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have to pay 8 euros for the annulment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the actual fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I don't have a laptop AND I have to pay 8 euros extra to them for it. !?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!
Like, why are the shop and customer service telling me and doing completely opposite things!?!?!?!?!? I will NOT pay that money, cause I was told the annulment of the contract is not necessary and the annullment will be annulled. If they didn't do it and went ahead and annulled my fucking contract it's on them, they need to pay it, not me.
Fuuuuuuuckckckckck! I just want a fucking working laptop!!!!!!!!! Why is it so fucking difficult!?!?!?!??!!??!!?
I will call both, the shop and that damn customer service dude, tomorrow and chew their fucking heads off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's about Miranda.
Right so on the 21st of april I bought a laptop online. It was a friday, next week on wednesday (april 26) it was delivered to the closest shop. I went to get it right away. And on saturday that week, april 29, I had to take it back to the store. It wasn't charging normally. I did ring the customer service a few times to talk about it and they were the ones who told me to take it to the shop, so I did.
The shop said, the problem seemed to be with the charger cause they used the charger they had in the shop and it was charging normally. They said they'd give me a new charger but it needed to be delivered from another shop. They said since I had the computer for such little time they'd replace it and not send it to warranty repair. Cool.
Then they ordered the new charger, the same type as my original one was. Thed charging problem maintained with the new one. They decided the laptop was the problem. They said they were gonna send it to warranty repair. I didn't agree. It was a new and expensive laptop and I wanted a new and working one, not a reapired thing. I said I only had it for three days and I want it replaced. They said, I'd have to make a new contract for the new one, that they wouldn't just replace it like the charger I guess.
That was all in the shop. We agreed in the shop that I'd send a message to customer service and see what they say. Oh and that weekend, I went to the shop 5 times cause when they said if they had any new information they'd call me. They never did, I had to go there cause I didn't have the shop's number.
Anyway, I got home and called customer service, told them the story. They told me to send it in in a letter to have a physical evidence of it all.
Got a reply from customer service. That dude said, they will replace but they don't have any of the same laptop's left. Okay.
By that time I was sure I didn't want Miranda anymore so I had to take the original laptop box back to the shop. When I got there I showed them the letter (I took a pic of it on my phone).
They were like, okay, let's finish the contract then. They gave me a paper to fill. Had to ride to my mum's workplace for her to sign it. And then ride back to the shop.
The thing is, there was another one of those laptops left. The shop dude had ordered it to my hometown for me and it was off the internet, so whoever checked didn't see it as available on there.
So the shop dude said, now we just have to wait til the laptop gets delivered.
I went home and rang the customer service dude cause he had said in the mail he was waiting for a reply from me. So I called, quicker.
I told him it was sorted, that the new laptop was coming. And he said that was news to him. So I told him there actually was one laptop left and it was ordered for me. He also said that the contract doesn't need to be ended, that the laptop would just be replaced. He said he'd call the shop for clarification and call me back.
So he called me back and said, they will just replace the laptop and no contract needs to be ended. So I told him we already did the contract thing and he said he'd call the shop and stop the contract annulment. I asked him like what was gonna happen now and he said that I just have to go to the shop and pick up the laptop when it arrives and don't have to do anything else.
Then!
Yesterday I called the shop to check if the laptop had arrived yet (cause as experience has shown, they don't contact me when they say they will). It hadn't. And the shop dude was going on about the annulment of the contract, like we have to wait for it or something. I didn't pay any mind to it cause I was told, I don't have to do anything and nothing will be annulled (by customer service).
Then today I discovered mum had received a confirmation of the annulment of the contract on her email. PLUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have to pay 8 euros for the annulment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the actual fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I don't have a laptop AND I have to pay 8 euros extra to them for it. !?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!
Like, why are the shop and customer service telling me and doing completely opposite things!?!?!?!?!? I will NOT pay that money, cause I was told the annulment of the contract is not necessary and the annullment will be annulled. If they didn't do it and went ahead and annulled my fucking contract it's on them, they need to pay it, not me.
Fuuuuuuuckckckckck! I just want a fucking working laptop!!!!!!!!! Why is it so fucking difficult!?!?!?!??!!??!!?
I will call both, the shop and that damn customer service dude, tomorrow and chew their fucking heads off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday, May 06, 2017
Lip smacking
Okay, I've been reading up about my reading problems. Some scary stuff is out there, don't think I have them serious problems. If it gets worse or persists I'm going to the doctor. Although, I did read about long time olanzapine side effects and I saw lip smacking was on the list!!!! I legit have that. Not as in, oh I read it might be and I do it so I must have it. I legit do it all the time, so much that my lips are dry and have to use lip balm all the time. I never knew it was cause of olanzapine. I had no idea why I'm doing it but now I know. This is insane lol. Lip smaking? Seriously!? I've started doing it in the past six months. Good thing is, I'm on 1,25mg dosage every other day and looks like I might get off of it altogether this time.
Yeah and my laptop saga isn't ending anytime soon it seems. Yeah, Miranda is definitely gone. Out of my life. Forever.
I was told by the customer service I can just get a new laptop, go into shop, pick it up and go home. But the shop sings a different song. Have to do new contracts and shit. Ughhhh!!!
Yeah and my laptop saga isn't ending anytime soon it seems. Yeah, Miranda is definitely gone. Out of my life. Forever.
I was told by the customer service I can just get a new laptop, go into shop, pick it up and go home. But the shop sings a different song. Have to do new contracts and shit. Ughhhh!!!
Friday, May 05, 2017
Should I be worried?
Okay, I woke up early today cause I was too excited about getting a new laptop today. Which I probably won't cause... why would I get what I want!?
Yeah, what got me writing is this... for a while now, think it's only been this year, I read things wrong. Like when I read stuff on the internet, be it on social media or news or whatever. It's really noticable and annoying cause I need to reread a sentence soooo many times. Like, my brain sees words that are not there. Right now there was a sentence that started with "Mother Nature..." and I saw "More Nature...". Like why does my brain invent these words!?!? It happens all the time, several times a day. And when the sentence doesn't, obviously, make sense to me I have to read it several, several times again, before my brain sees what's actually written. It happens both in english and in estonian. Should I be worried? Is it the pills I'm taking? I get enough sleep. I'm not more distracted than usually, before.
Yeah, what got me writing is this... for a while now, think it's only been this year, I read things wrong. Like when I read stuff on the internet, be it on social media or news or whatever. It's really noticable and annoying cause I need to reread a sentence soooo many times. Like, my brain sees words that are not there. Right now there was a sentence that started with "Mother Nature..." and I saw "More Nature...". Like why does my brain invent these words!?!? It happens all the time, several times a day. And when the sentence doesn't, obviously, make sense to me I have to read it several, several times again, before my brain sees what's actually written. It happens both in english and in estonian. Should I be worried? Is it the pills I'm taking? I get enough sleep. I'm not more distracted than usually, before.
Tuesday, May 02, 2017
Must have been dangerous
I could have sworn I posted the story about those crazy premonitions I had about my brother when I lived in Ireland. Maybe I'll post it one day. Anyway, had another premonition about him a few days ago.
I had a dream I was at my mum's and we were hiking. We weren't exactly at my mum's house, just in the area where she lives. I said I wanted to go by her house so I could see the dogs. I kinda left her behind and was walking back and forth without finding the dogs.
There was a young woman who was teaching some little school children to sing or something, outside where we were hiking. There was a bench behind her where her infant was sitting and he/she fell off the bench. I rushed to help it back up. Me and mum were thinking the young woman was a really bad mother.
And at some point Lauri had got into a car accident. Near the baby and hiking place. I can't remember now or maybe it never came out in the dream but I had hurt my right forearm really bad trying to save the infant and my brother.
And then me and mum were at a hospital where we were listening to some doctor saying how my brother needs to go to India to heal him. And my mum had to buy a hospital bed for him. And I thought it was stupid we had to buy the bed and asked mum why. She said "cause it's sterile, duh!" Apparently my arm was in a worse shape than my brother.
Yeah then called my mum later that day after I had woken up and told her that. She then said brother had been out til 3am one night being driven around. Must have been dangerous then.
TS252017
I had a dream I was at my mum's and we were hiking. We weren't exactly at my mum's house, just in the area where she lives. I said I wanted to go by her house so I could see the dogs. I kinda left her behind and was walking back and forth without finding the dogs.
There was a young woman who was teaching some little school children to sing or something, outside where we were hiking. There was a bench behind her where her infant was sitting and he/she fell off the bench. I rushed to help it back up. Me and mum were thinking the young woman was a really bad mother.
And at some point Lauri had got into a car accident. Near the baby and hiking place. I can't remember now or maybe it never came out in the dream but I had hurt my right forearm really bad trying to save the infant and my brother.
And then me and mum were at a hospital where we were listening to some doctor saying how my brother needs to go to India to heal him. And my mum had to buy a hospital bed for him. And I thought it was stupid we had to buy the bed and asked mum why. She said "cause it's sterile, duh!" Apparently my arm was in a worse shape than my brother.
Yeah then called my mum later that day after I had woken up and told her that. She then said brother had been out til 3am one night being driven around. Must have been dangerous then.
TS252017
Monday, May 01, 2017
I don't understand this
Okay, I'm pretty sure I'm just PMSing hard. Had some pink-y stuff going on before. Thank goodness.
Everything sucks at the moment. This fucking weekend is so stupid!
The whole laptop thing.
Then my bike stand-spoke thing.
My fucking wellbeing.
And I bet I will have a shit ton of problems at work tomorrow.
Why is it such a major thing that I have a new laptop? What is it the universe's problem that I have a new laptop? What the fuck else am I gonna do at home alone? Ugh, I don't understand this. It's stressing me out.
Oh yeah and I wanna see the universe shit on me for buying this caramel cake, to pamper myself and make myself feel better, when I have hardly any money for regular food. I bet something got fucked up with my pension and stuff and I won't even get money on friday. Fuck!
Everything sucks at the moment. This fucking weekend is so stupid!
The whole laptop thing.
Then my bike stand-spoke thing.
My fucking wellbeing.
And I bet I will have a shit ton of problems at work tomorrow.
Why is it such a major thing that I have a new laptop? What is it the universe's problem that I have a new laptop? What the fuck else am I gonna do at home alone? Ugh, I don't understand this. It's stressing me out.
Oh yeah and I wanna see the universe shit on me for buying this caramel cake, to pamper myself and make myself feel better, when I have hardly any money for regular food. I bet something got fucked up with my pension and stuff and I won't even get money on friday. Fuck!
So now I'm awake... feeling like crap
Okay, everything sucks right now! I don't have a new laptop, my damn bike stand is hitting the spokes when I'm riding which annoys the crap out of me and then it's my health.
Since last thursday I thought I've been having little cramps and pms. It is sort of unusual for me to have oms for that long. I can't explain the cramps but the nausea and anxiety and shit is probably cause of my damn pill, Olanzapin, that I'm trying to taper off. And this pills has messed up my periods before so maybe the cramps are connected to that aswell. I hope it's just pms though, a bad one. Like I couldn't sleep at all cause I was feeling too sick. I took a cerucal and valium but didn't make it much better. So now I'm awake... feeling like crap.
And I still hope that at least my cactus will thrive out of this horrible situation after the replanting.
Since last thursday I thought I've been having little cramps and pms. It is sort of unusual for me to have oms for that long. I can't explain the cramps but the nausea and anxiety and shit is probably cause of my damn pill, Olanzapin, that I'm trying to taper off. And this pills has messed up my periods before so maybe the cramps are connected to that aswell. I hope it's just pms though, a bad one. Like I couldn't sleep at all cause I was feeling too sick. I took a cerucal and valium but didn't make it much better. So now I'm awake... feeling like crap.
And I still hope that at least my cactus will thrive out of this horrible situation after the replanting.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)