No, not like the princess, it's like the goddess

So I started reminiscing old times yesterday.

I was just chilling out at my Dad's place when I was about 16 or 17.
Back then I was really into metal music and rockier stuff.
You know like some angsty teen.
One band that I listened to was Godsmack.
So there I was chilling out, surfing the net on my mobile phone.
I decided to look up some Godsmack's lyrics and interviews.
I came over this interview with Sully Erna.
He was talking of this religion called Wicca.
I had never heard of it.
I cannot remember the exact quote but as much as I do remember I believe he said something like that the religion is about creativity. Or like celebrating the arts or something.
Anyway, whatever he said, I liked what I was reading.

So I looked up this Wicca thing on my mobile.
And when I found out it had to do with Roman and Greek mythology and the gods, I was hooked.
Especially cause my name's Diana.
And I've always thought that normally when some sleazy people ask for my name and I tell them what it is, they're like "Oh, like the princess" , then in my head I'm like "No, not like the princess, it's like the goddess".
I'm not sure why my parents went for this name, but here I am stuck with it for my whole life.

Anyway, I was reading about the religion and was very interested in it.
Then as I knew back then I thought there must be some horribly clouding "rules" when you want to follow the religion.
I found the Wiccan Rede.
And the idea of the religion is that do whatever you want as long as you're not hurting anyone, including yourself.
I was seriously surprised when I saw it, cause my motto at the time was exactly that. Pluss "and don't embarrass your family".
I was really very into it just as soon as I first learned about it.

After reading about it on my phone, I got my father's wife to go to the library with me (I didn't have the library card myself).
I got books about the Roman and Greek gods and mythology.
While reading I would write down all the gods and other figures that were mentioned and an explanation who they were and what they're purpose and impact was.

The gods I found most interesting were, well obviously Diana, Apollon, Zeus, Aradia, the Titan Kronos and the Grace Euphreyne.

I don't think I ever actually called myself Wiccan, but I sure agreed with a lot that was in the religion.
And that what i liked about it - I didn't have to change my mind or myself and my beliefs, the religion just fit into my life and me.

The only thing that I didn't like was that I believe depending on what path of the religion you choose you "have to be" vegeterian or just one of those people who really have to limit their eating somehow.

And I never supported marriage. But if I were to get married I'd do it the pagan way.
The trial marriage makes so much sense.
And I'd love to do the jumping over the broom thing and just to add some of my nationality in to it, I'd jump over a bonfire aswell. :D

So as much as I agree with everything that the religion is about I wouldn't call myself Wiccan. If anything, maybe eclecting Wiccan or just pagan.
I just believe in energy. I believe in it in a scientific way.
And I do love a lot of things to do with the Earth.

I know I sit on the inernet for too long and that's bad for the Earth and I'm too lazy to put recycable things into the special bin - that's why I wouldn't really call myself anything or anyone - but I'm really into anything green. That's why I want to go and do biology. I want to do so much I cannot pinpoint anything in particular.

Yeah, that's just what I remembered yesterday.

I also remembered this one time when I was talking to a friend about Wicca.
He said that I'm just calling myself one cause I want to be popular or something and that it's really not a religion is just a bunch of people who like to show off.
Then he told me what he believed in.
He said him and some of his friends (9 to be precise) had a motto that goes like this: "Have fun every second cause you might die at any time".
So I asked him how was that - the 10 people motto -  "more legit" than Wicca that has a lot more followers.
So I asked what his motto was called.

He said it doesn't have a name, you just believe in it.
I guess every religion is like some kind of motto that has a name so people can define themselves more easily.
So I went ahead and said, "I know what you're religion or motto is called. It's called puberty."
I believe he kicked me in the legs for that.
Then I said, "If it makes you feel any better then it's not just you who's hit puberty but all your 9 friends aswell".
That resulted in a smack over the head.
:D
I thought it was funny and I still think it's funny.

But I think that's actually one of the reasons I don't follow any religion.
Cause people change.
And if people want to call Wicca as Neo-Paganism then I guess it's okay.
I don't think there's anything wrong with renewing a religion, more so in ideas and points of it, traditions of celebrating it can stay the same, just to honour the base of it all.

I wasn't trying to preach or anything, just put in my two cents.

Resignation

Yeah, that's about it. I'm free. And poor.
Especially poor.

And I still have the headache.
I think it's cause of the antidepressants.
Blahhh...

And I'm so craving something very very bad for me.
Like crisps or something.
I would've gone and bought cheese and eat that but the shop's closed now.
The local Spar sells Gouda for 1.59.
Bargin!
Gouda's the best cheese and since the Irish people like Cheddar they don't know they're giving good stuff away at a very low price.

I'm either going to play more sims now or watch a film.
Maybe do an update on my sims story page.

Oh and I love Justin Bieber's Somebody To Love.
I love pop music!
I love music, except the narrow minded people who like rock.

Alejandro pattern

So this new thing came out: CAP

Create-a-pattern.

At first, as espected with an EA product it wouldn't work, but luckily I got it sorted.

I've been busy on it for the most of the day.

My brain is, say, medium rare.

Here are some of my creations: My Sim Page

They're not the best but it's okay, I'm not the most creative person when it comes to visual stuff.

And YAY! I have two recommendations.

And I happened to watch Lady GaGa's Alejandro video.

Dang it, I have the song in my head now.

Anyways, I'm off to create patterns now.

Watch and learn, you retail jobbed little people!!!

Hmh.

As of now I'm fucked when it comes to money.

Okay like there's this system thing that allows you to have some social welfare benefit.

The thing is you're only allowed to get it when you live in the same country with your family.

So, basically it's like when you have people around you who can financially support you, you're allowed to get the benefit.

If you're all alone with no one to support you you're fucked, you're not entitled to any benefit at all.

Oh yes, yet another fair law.

Seriously, all the people in the position to create and change laws are super humans - I mean they have shit in their heads!!!

Why don't you cunts go and get bent!?

Anyways, no more paying rent from now on.

And no eating either.

Oh and another thing.

Went down to Social Welfare for rent allowance.

They told me to go down to the Health Board.

People there told me to go to another office in another town.

Luckily I didn't go.

Went to the Health Board today so.

A man there told me I should've got a rent allowance form from Social Welfare.

Oh my god, how organised are those people?! Spectacular!!!

Watch and learn, you retail jobbed little people!!!

And one more thing.

When before I had to fill in some forms and get pissed off cause they ask about my marital status and stuff about my spouse then now they're asking about the people I live with, their names and salary. Talk about nosy!

The only good thing is I got my sim game to work.

Without Ambitions of course and the shitty update.

I found a receipt for the game.

Unfortunately it says you can take the game back in 7 days time.

Well, since I'm short of money and the game doesn't work I'll try to bring it back.

I just tell them I was waiting for an update that would fix everything but since there's nothing I want my money back.

And I so want to eat crisps!

I adore crisps!

I haven't bought any cause I don't wanna feel sick.

Boo!

56, 4 kilos. Yeah, bitches!!!

Okay, I don't know if it's a cold, PMS or just a first ever thing, but I have a headache.

I've had a bit of a sore head before but it's always been cause of a cold.

Today I have a very odd pain and I'm not sure what it is.

Plus the previous night was a nightmare.

Literally.

I think I woke myself up by making some sort of noise.

At the time I was kind of thinking that I heard a little boy's voice and that woke me up.

The second time I randomly opened my eyes and saw a little boy standing in the middle of my room.

I think it was kind of like a dream or something cause I know I woke myself up again by screaming and waving my hand to tell the boy to get away from me.

Weird.

I was spooked though.

I turned on the ceiling light and put on a film and tried going back to sleep.

I kept waking up and feeling funny though.

Maybe I've read too many ghost stories lately and it's having an impact on me.

I even took a painkiller for the pain but it didn't make a difference.

That kind of makes me quite sure it's a cold.

Ugh, I was gonna bring in the resignation notice to work today, but I don't really feel like going out.

I haven't even taken a shower yet.

Oh and I got to weigh myself yesterday.

56, 4 kilos.

Yeah, bitches!!! :D

I'm getting there.

Ehh.. to my normal weight.

The last time I weighed this much was when I was 16.

Give me another few months and I'll be 60 kilos.

That's my goal.

It makes me very happy when all my clothes are very very tight and I struggle when putting them on.

Like there's this skirt I wore when I didn't weigh as much and I could pull it down a bit to make it look longer.
Whereas now it just looks very very short cause it gets stuck around my ass.

K said it's a bit slutty and that she could see my butt cheeks and all, but the skirt was so tight on me it kept my arse in place, it wasn't all jiggly like normally.

Oh while typing this I got a phone call from a woman who's involved with the volunteering business.

I'm meeting her next Wednesday at 2 to talk about some garden I'll be working at.

Meeting her at a restaurant called Cupcake.

I don't even know where it is. Have to go find out before next week.

Anyways, I'm off to... try and cook lunch and shower and just in case I'll cleanse my room with my Californian sage. I don't want to see that little boy again.