I'm procrastinating

Ughh...I feel so guilty today. Feel like I'm procrastinating. Probably cause the weather is so nice out and I'm inside doing nothing. If I was at my mother's I could be outside working. Whenever I'm in town, I'm always inside. I have nowhere to go in Tartu. Sometimes I go on a little bike ride but that's over before you know it.

And I still don't have a job.

Also, I feel a bit guilty cause of men. I've agreed to meet with some of them but I haven't. I just don't wanna take Valium when it's not necessary. And taking it for a quick shag is not necessary. So I haven't had men over. I wouldn't mind shagging but I've told some of the men I'm after a relationship and I wish I hadn't told them that. I'm really not after one. I want a very simple Walk-into-my-room-Take-your-pants-off-Oh-great-you're-hard-I-hop-on-I-hop-off-Bye! type of thing. And the men I have now are all of the ones I've been with before which is also off putting. I feel like they're becoming my ball and chain. Ughhhh!

Yeah...I guess I'll just play the Sims then.

Bitches, that's communism for ya!!!

Yeah...I've ranted about this before but whatever. I have to ask again, why do people hate communism so much!?
Nowadays people are preaching about gay rights and anti racism and anti bullying and shit. Bitches, that's communism for ya!!!
If not political, then social and racial and sexual communism. Damn, people are contradictory.

I nearly wept

Oh my god. I nearly wept right now. I went to the shop yesterday and today and they didn't have blue cheese. I had totally forgotten that I had bought an extra one last week. Just found it in the fridge. Made me so happy! This is the bestest thing I've done to myself in a LOOOOOOOOOOONG time.

don't feel as sick today

Oh my goddess, I felt so incredibly sick yesterday. And I think it was cause I didn't take my pills. I even rode to Tartu to take them. I also took 30 drops of Valium and it made me feel a little better.
When I got home in Tartu I took all of my crazy pills and started feeling really sleepy. Went to bed at 6 and woke up today at about 12. Luckily don't feel as sick today.

like a zombie

Oh my god! I feel like a zombie. Dunno if it's cause I haven't taken my crazy pills or cause I'm PMSing. I feel like curling up in a ball and dying.