Had to go to Viljandi yesterday.
It's this small but beautiful town.
Ugh, since I still get panic attacks when travelling I decided to go there by train. Alone.
Mainly cause I can't bear to be around my father and there's no way I want to depend on him when I'm at my weakest and lowest point. By that I mean, I don't want him to take me to the town in his car when I'm having several panic attacks.
And the second reason is that I don't want to depend on anyone or have anyone to support me when I have panic attacks. I want to get over this stupid fear of mine.
Well... it didn't really work cause I did get panic attacks and I wasn't completely alone. I rang my mother just as soon as I got on the train cause I started shaking and crying like a crazy motherfucker.
And I just kept saying, "I want to get off so bad. Right! Now!" over and over to my mother.
Anyway, I lasted all the way there and back with my mother on the phone for an hour altogether.
All that drama aside it was a great day.
Was nice to leave this little village of a town for a day.
I got there in the morning around half ten and got back by five so I had enough time to hang out there.
Unfortunately I had nothing planned and don't know the town too well.
I just wandered around and came across this amazing looking place.
Too bad I didn't have a camera with me.
I did a little research and this is the place I was at yesterday:
I also went to the Museum. I was really impressed with those really delicate and sharp knife type of things. I don't think people nowadays could make something like that out of a couple of stones.
Yeah and when I got back to my hometown I went straight to the belly dance practice.
I'm not sure I can really do it. I have to film myself dancing first so I remember the steps and moves then try and get good at it.
Oh and just remembered - when I was talking to my mother on the way to the town she was at the dentist, in the waiting room. I said I'd rather be at the dentist than be on train and she said she'd rather ride a train ten times than be at the dentist. Anyway, she had to give out to me a few times so that I wouldn't get off the train and to do that she had to leave the waiting room. She was risking losing her appointment to keep me on train, but since she's scared of the dentist I was kinda doing her a favour :D
Yeah, that's about it. Have to start working on my forum again, letting things go a bit there. Oops.
