think I can't do it cause I'm too lazy

Waah, I'm kinda  nervous about my job interview thingy in the morning. My mother and Lembit think I can't do it cause I'm too lazy. I hope I can cause the pay is good. And I wish we get half an hour for a break so I can ride home, eat at home then go back. Ahhh...so nervous.

Will be going back tomorrow

So I got to town about an hour ago. Will be going back tomorrow. I have to go to a farm in Melliste on wednesday to see if I can wrok there. Will be either milking cows or looking after calves. Right now I'm excited about the work though. I'm thinking my anxiety won't be as bad in the countryside as it would be in town. Yeah if I do get the job it means I'd be moving in with my mother's family. Ahh, so excited!

constantly hungry but can't eat

Oh goddess... my head's going crazy. Been out of it ever since Thursday. Nauseous and dizzy. Thinking it's cause I stopped taking Mirtazapine. I'll try to wait it out now and hope I'll feel better in time. I don't understand what it is with my body that when I don't take my pills I feel nauseous. Like what the fuck!? I feel constantly hungry but can't eat. Even when I eat I still feel like I'm hungry. Ughhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!

Even the thought of it gives me anxiety

Well, I got my sweet babe working again. I hope it'll last til at least next year.

Yeah and I talked to Aksel the other day. Yeah looks like when he said his friends wouldn't accept me cause I'm fat meant he thought I wasn't good looking enough for him. He said it took some time to get used to. And then we talked about me going over to his place. Argh... I want to but I'm scared. Even the thought of it gives me anxiety. Will see....

Blub, my bike broke

Blub, my bike broke. It  was bumping when riding for quite a while and now it completely broke. Will go to the bike shop tomorrow to get it fixed. Hopefully they can fix it right away cause I cannot travel to places any way else.

edit: Oh and my mother was on TV again. There was a segment on the news about tractors made in China.
Yeah and my heart is almost broken cause of my baby bike.