Tool

Okay I think I was just stood up. The guy said he would run a little late. Two hous later I still hadn't heard from him. Tool.

Apparently he's a virgin. Looks like for a long time so

Apparently he's a virgin. Looks like for a long time so

Should I be flattered?

manless

Shit. I'm manless again. One won't come online anymore and the other won't answer my text. Ugh.
Hopefully next week I'll get some action again.

What the hell body!?

WTF!? Today I feel nothing when it comes to intimacy. I feel grossed out about it. What the hell body!? What do you want!? Although, I stayed in town today in case we might meet up again.

when I get a taste of something good, I wanna swallow it whole

Gah, when I get a taste of something good, I wanna swallow it whole. I so wanna spend time with my new guy. Maybe there's no relationship for us in the future but I crave intimacy. When I'm without it, I'm fine but when I catch a glimpse of it I gotta see the panorama.

friendshipping

Wow. I have no idea what to do with a guy who doen't wanna have sex :D Like, I hung out with Indrek again. And I don't know if we're having something or just friendshipping.
It was quite a big deal cause we didn't hang out at my place but his. Yes, I lasted there two hours.

so much cuter

What a great day. Had a great therapy session with my psychologist. We went for a walk to train me walking alone in the street. And she told me a little about her 5 year old son. It's so great having young children cause they wanna see all the new cute cartoons. I wanna see them anyway but it would be so much cuter if I had to see them cause of my little child.

impromptu date

Just had an impromptu date. If I remember it correctly his name was Indrek.
Dunno if I'll see him again cause he wants to get his leg over and I want a relationship. Will see. He was nice though.

No biggie

Well, I didn't get the job. No biggie :)
Yeah and my mum cut my hair today and I got a fringe!! I had wanted one for so long but with my anxiety it's a nightmare to sit at the hairdresser's.

didn't turn it down yet

Crapaloola! The job I applied for is the most basic telemarketing position. I didn't turn it down yet. Will be making phone calls tomorrow and see how it is.

one bastard

Shit, my mother had a tick on her. Hopefully she won't get one of the tick illnesses. And hopefully I don't have one bastard on me.

so beat

Oh god, I'm so beat. We mushroomed for 5 hours today plus I mowed the lawn.

TS1292015

so so so sad

This song makes me so so so sad.

my way only

So a couple of weeks ago or so me and mum were walking our dogs and we got to talking. Like, I dunno if it's cause I'm getting older and more senile by the day but I might actually marry someone. Like, it would be without any dresses and suits, food, family, celebration. I'd just get hitched without a fuss. I mean I still hate getting married cause it's a societal thng but meh... if the man really wanted I might do it. But my way only!

Ah, dreams

Oh man, I so wish I can do the receptionist job. I already make big plans for the future. Like, I want a new place cause Ilme is severly cutting into my personal life. Like, it shouldn't be her business who I see or what I do with people. But she makes everything her business. Fuck, I'm a young woman, not a 72 year old nun like her.
I wouldn't wanna live totally alone. It would be nice to have flatmates. Preferably young ones who sleep around too or simply don't give a fuck who I sleep with. Ah, dreams.

job interview on tuesday

Oh goodness, I have a job interview on tuesday. For an receptionist position at a spa or something. It's part time. I so hope the interview goes well and I get the job and that I won't get anxiety!

my life turned to shit

Jesus, what's going on in the world!? What with the refugees and shit... So horrible. I hope I don't have to flee my homeland. The last time I did, my life turned to shit.

Shit I dream big!

Shit I dream big! I really want a part time janitor position and study to become a pharmacist now. If my health was a little better I might be able to.

want those plums

Went to the shop earlier. Saw plums there. Didn't by them. Now want those plums. Should've bought them. I also want a mcdonald's burger. My bike is busted so... I cant be arsed to walk there cause by the time I get home the bruger will be cold.
I really hope Ic an fix my bike tomorrow.

baby bike

Aw, my baby bike broke down. The rear tyre broke when I was at Peruoja. Had to walk home from there. Have blisters on the soles of my feet now.Will go to the bike shop tomorrow to get a new tyre.

And then I had a little epiphany. Like, if I get a part time janitor position I can still go to uni. I only need about 150 euros a month. Oh man... I just need to retake my biology exam to get extra six points. Yeah it's not a big dream of mine, I just thought of it all of a udden one day.

Who told you to look at me grandpa!? Gross!

What the fuck!? Right I'm on this sexy online dating website... I've had a few men tell me I'm not attractive or whatever. And it's cool, I'm not particulary attractive anyway, I know but the way they say stuff. Like they sound so bitter. And it's always some old dude, in his forties or so. Their opinion matters even less to me. I'd be worried if my preferred demographic found me disgusting but these old hats... no.
Seriously, what the hell is wrong with these old men being so hateful about some younger chick?

a little walk

Wow wow! I just got in from a lone walk. I didn't just circle around my house, I actually walked on the street. I went to take out trash and it felt so fresh and brisk out so I thought I'd take a little walk. It was quite dark and I only saw two people. Ah... it felt amazing! I haven't walked outside by myself in years.

I love it here

Ahhh, I'm in town!!! I love it here. Ilme went to hospital cause her arteries were clogged or something like it and I'm home alone. Damn, why don't I have a man right now!? I don't want to call a randomer over.
I have been at my mother's too long and have forgotten how amazing it is in town. Just wish I had money, would go to McDonald's.

I'm happy

So for some reason I'm happy summer is over. I got really excited for the autumn season on TV. I don't even watch TV. I feel like it's a new era in my life. Maybe one where I have a job and can sort out my own money business. I would love some half assed job so that my mother would stop complaining about me not having a job. I'd need about 150 euros a month.
Ooh and I got my new ID card today. Will have to go to the bank some day aswell, cause my ATM card is invalid.
Ah yeah...that's about it. I got anxiety today in the ID office and shops but I'm happy. Yay!