Been a few days

Right - went to my GP. Lovely man.
Got my certificates for work and social welfare.:)
Will do the rest next week.

Oh took an antidepressant last night, my first ever :
- blurry, jumpy vision
- nausea for the whole night
- shaky body
- strong pressure and pain in the head
Yep, feeling better already!
No need for the rest three packs of them.

Will have to drink some radioactive stuff for ultrasound instead of some doctor making me gag for half an hour by ramming a bloody camera in tube down my throat.
Supposedly it's like a salty smoothie.

Been doing fuck all.
Boyfriend's gone for the weekend.
I am getting better at my violin, though.;)

Oh and I'm absolutely out of money.
Asked a friend for a loan of 50. He was so nice and thought he'll give me 500.
Will see how that goes - meeting him tomorrow or Monday.:)

Doctor

So I went to see the doctor.
Lost weight - now 49 kilos.
Blood tests.
Endoscopy that I'll never do.
Antidepressants that I'll never take.
Considering homeopathy.
Expensive - 80 euro a session.
Seeing GP tomorrow.

Did have sex this morning though:)

Oh and felt sick all night, What Dreams May Come kept me company.
Three times.

Right off to mix protein powder with banana-kiwi juice.

Conversation

Oh god, just remembered - talked to my ex yesterday.
On msn.
How annoying is it, when you don't like a person in a romantic way and don't want to have anything to do with them cause of your romantic past, but your conversations just have that magic flow?!
I hate talking to other men, especially an ex, when in a relationship - feel like I'm cheating on the current man.
Well anyway, now I know my ex has loadsa naked pictures of himself, he's dating some rich girl and that he's been to hospital with some unpleasant things.
Didn't really want to know any of it.

Went for a walk

Yeah if you don't go out much and then one day you do, you end up with a cold sore.
My body's not used to the wind.
Walked for one hour...along the town streets.
I have a massive fear that's keeping me on streets - crossing bridges.
Can't go for a walk on the countryside, cause this town is kept off from the rest of the world by this stupid river.
I swear to um...god, if I had to cross any of them bridges by myself I'd have a panic attack.

Yeah, had the weird buckwheat porridge yesterday again and this morning as well - think the E621 in it is making me feel all boo hoo.
So that means no naughty stuff has been going on - even though things were leading that way.;)

Today's a lovely rainy day - might clean up the house. It's smelly.


Good things:

• Doritos corn chips - tangy cheese flavour

Hmm...come to think of it, I had two packs yesterday, that could've made me feel sick.

• Edward Maya - Stereo Love ( Vika Jigulina's vocals)

Company

Right so, my boyfriend came home last night, around 11 or so.
Watched TV.
Sort of having a habit of going to bed at decent hour lately.
Woke up to sex this morning, which was finished off with a BJ.:)
Mm...cum shots! Hahahaaa
Going to take a shower and think about what to do today.