I envy women

I envy women with nice cuticles. I haven't chewed my nails since I was about 11 (I quit cause this woman on Santa Barbara had the most beautiful long, red nails and I wanted to have mine like that. Quit right then and there). But to this day I haven't been able to stop chewing my cuticles. They make my hands looks so unmaintained and gross. Ugh, I can't stop! They're all bloody and sore.