Stories from the madhouse. Part one.

So, I'm still in the madhouse.
And as I said earlier I've been writing stuff down.
I'll type it all up here now so... if it sounds a bit weird at times then I must have felt really sick or something. I'll try to change a few things as I go along to make the story better.

I planned to go to Tartu by bus on the 11th of July.

I only lasted til the first stop.

I just started panicking cause the flight to Estonia freaked me out too much so now everykind of travelling freaks me out.

I got off the bus so and started walking away from my hometown along the motorway.

Long story short, I was left in the middle of nowhere and had my dad come and pick me up and take me back home. Then I must have had some sort of nervous breakdown, cause I felt sick forever.
And on Monday, I think, I was taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
Was put in the psychiatric part.

And well, besides all the crying, drama, breakdowns and sickness, it has been quite interesting.

To be continued....

I wanna eat

So, in short, I'm in a madhouse.

I'm kind of keeping a diary so once I get time I'll type it all up here.

Nothing too interesting, just depressing.

I wanna normal happy life.

And I wanna eat.

I cannot eat.:(

Boo hoo hoo....

Shitty day

Shitty shitty shitty day!

if I do then I won't

Ahh.

So tired.

Spent most of the day "na datchu".

Think it's correct.

Yeah, I was weeding all day.

I only got one bed done.

It was like a jungle, seriously.

I thought Robin Williams will hop out any second.

My back's pretty tanned now, but legs are still white.

I tried just tanning my legs but yeah doesn't work like that.

I started reading a book on ecology today.

Very interesting, totally something I wanna do.

Will write down more important things.

Oh and I found a saying - "bed hop".

I love it!

I gotta start bed hopping. :D

Haven't met any men over here yet.

Well, mostly cause I don't know hwo things are with me and the "bf".

It would be kind of weird having him come over in August when I have a new man.

I just have to wait.

Right, I gotta go and take a shower again, cause I'm in a very bad state.

Dirt, dirty, dirty.

Oh and I might go down to Tartu tomorrow if I feel like it.

Health wise.

The bus goes at 8 in the morning so... if I don't freak out I'll go, if I do then I won't.

If I do go though then I'll be staying with my mum.

And they have this little lake about 5 mins away from their house.

So I can stay at the beach all day and swim. And sunbathe.

Yeah, shower now and then read my ecology book.

All summery

I went gathering strawberries today.

It was around noon time so it was well hot.

Gahh, those bastard flies and mosquitoes.

They pissed me off so much what with the flying in my face and the biting me.

Anyway, it was me and IR.

And the field was some old lady's.

My clothes actually had wet patches on them cause I was sweating so much.

Then I looked at all the courses I'll be applying for.

Dang, I don't know how to apply.

That damn SAIS thing isn't working for me.

Then a few hours ago we went weeding in our own garden.

I love weeding.

I did potatoes and onions.

The problem was though that half of the garden was in shade cause the sun started to set.

I know it was a problem in the morning, that the sun's hot that is, but I'd rather it shine than set, cause then I have a hope for a tan.

I have a bit on my shoulders and chest, but I think it looks more like I'm dirty. And IR said, "Oh come on, look at your shoulders, they're all yellow!" when I complained about not having a tan. Right.

I'm about to have my thrid shower today.

Just need to get a few phone numbers off people via email.

I took the charger for my camera with me, but left the camera behind.

Took the phone with me, but left it's charger in Ireland.

Stupid!

Anyways, I bought a new phone and have an Estonian number now so... yay!

Oh oh, I also went to the library.

Some of the courses I want to take require a test.

I don't know what sort of a test, but I want to study something.

I got maths books, biology books, biochemistry and just chemistry books.

And some environmental books aswell.

I so hope I will be able to do something.

I must get into something.

And my "bf"'s talking about going back to studying.

He wants to become a science teacher.

Interesting.

Oh and he will most likely come and visit me in August so.. that should be fun aswell.

Right, off to shower and eat!