no lattes anymore, ever

Ugh, the day started so good and then I had a latte. Yeah, no lattes anymore, ever.

And I even said,"I bet something turns to shit now cause it always does" and seeeee? It did!

Okay, I think I ight get fired. I pissed off my supervisor today. I just felt like I was treated unfairly and was being used and I tried to talk to her and she snapped at me saying she doesn't wanna hear it cause she has enough problems. She asked me to cover for the girl that cleans during the day and I said I didn't wanna cause she wouldn't cover for me the last time. The first time she went to some model casting during her work hours and I had to cover for her. Then a couple of days later I wanted a day off to go to my borther's 9th grade graduation. Yeah nobody could be found to cover for me so I couldn't go cause you know... model casting is a lot more serious, like having a job interview for another position during your work hours when someone else is covering for you is a lot more important and deserves a day off.
Then I told my supervisor I didn't wanna do it for the girl anymore cause of that. And then my supervisor told me I would be doing it for her not the girl. So I reluctantly agreed. Only cause of the money.
By the end of the day I had so much anger in me that I just had to call her and tell her how I felt. This time the girl needed a day off cause one of her kids got sick. Okay. Thing is, I was sick twice this winter and asked for days off, my supervisor didn't accommodate. And now some kid falls ill and I have to accomodate? For the woman who didn't let me go to my little brother's graduation?
Why is her kid more important than my little brother? Why is the kid's health more important than mine?
My supervisor said that they don't even have to give days off but that she does accommodate sometimes. Okay, how is it okay to have a worker go on a job interview for another position during her work hours? Like and when I'm sick and ask for a day off, it's not important?
And then my supervisor just was like "well, don't come tomorrow then". I dunno if she meant to cover for the girl or at all. I mean I will go in in the evening and do my own part cause I haven't done anything wrong.

Yeah and I've talked about this before whenever I say something is good it gets fucked. And it happened today. I had lunch today with mum and I told her I love my job cause the people and my boss are normal. And I even said,"I bet something turns to shit now cause it always does" and seeeee? It did!

A good thing hopefully is that my new laptop thing almost got sorted today. I have to go in tomorrow with mum and sign the new contract and hopefully it'll be done and well this time.

Also, when mum was over last time, we ordered some things off the internet. One thing was a phone case. And it arrived today and looked so lovely. And they're super cheap. I looked at some for my phone today. Mum should come over in two weeks so hopefully we'll get to order stuff again.

Also, I went to wash my bike today in the manual car wash. Yeah there was a gap/slot for some partner card thingy or gift card and I'm stupid and stuck a coin in there :D So embarrassing! Whoever went in there after me definitely thought some complete idiot was there before them. And they'd be right. I went to check the wash in the evening to see if the coin was gone cause I felt bad about "breaking" it. It seemed to be gone.

Oh yeah and I sent out some CVs on those job hunt sites. Just in case.

Oh and I got to use my bike bell today for the first time. Like purposefully. Yeah, I tingled it at some woman when I went across the bridge. They delivered my mum's bag in the wrong post office, had to go across the bridge to fetch it.
Yeah and went to the bike shop to get my bike stand fixed so it wouldn't hit the spokes. The nut or whatever was rusted shut so they put some oil or something on it, have to go back in a few days, maybe we can get it off then. And I plan on changing my break pads aswell sometime this month hopefully.

Oh and today/yesterday I'm officially on 1,25mg of Olanzapine ever 2 days. Last year this time I was on 10mg a day.
The reading thing I complained about must be from my pill or withdrawal. Also I smak, suck and lick my lips like crazy. They're so dry. Definitely the pill or withdrawal again.

Ughhh.... I hope I won't be fired and my supervisor calms down.

super livid

Since I'm super livid right now, and the emotion is fresh here I go....
It's about Miranda.
Right so on the 21st of april I bought a laptop online. It was a friday, next week on wednesday (april 26) it was delivered to the closest shop. I went to get it right away. And on saturday that week, april 29, I had to take it back to the store. It wasn't charging normally. I did ring the customer service a few times to talk about it and they were the ones who told me to take it to the shop, so I did.
The shop said, the problem seemed to be with the charger cause they used the charger they had in the shop and it was charging normally. They said they'd give me a new charger but it needed to be delivered from another shop. They said since I had the computer for such little time they'd replace it and not send it to warranty repair. Cool.
Then they ordered the new charger, the same type as my original one was. Thed charging problem maintained with the new one. They decided the laptop was the problem. They said they were gonna send it to warranty repair. I didn't agree. It was a new and expensive laptop and I wanted a new and working one, not a reapired thing. I said I only had it for three days and I want it replaced. They said, I'd have to make a new contract for the new one, that they wouldn't just replace it like the charger I guess.
That was all in the shop. We agreed in the shop that I'd send a message to customer service and see what they say. Oh and that weekend, I went to the shop 5 times cause when they said if they had any new information they'd call me. They never did, I had to go there cause I didn't have the shop's number.
Anyway, I got home and called customer service, told them the story. They told me to send it in in a letter to have a physical evidence of it all.
Got a reply from customer service. That dude said, they will replace but they don't have any of the same laptop's left. Okay.
By that time I was sure I didn't want Miranda anymore so I had to take the original laptop box back to the shop. When I got there I showed them the letter (I took a pic of it on my phone).
They were like, okay, let's finish the contract then. They gave me a paper to fill. Had to ride to my mum's workplace for her to sign it. And then ride back to the shop.
The thing is, there was another one of those laptops left. The shop dude had ordered it to my hometown for me and it was off the internet, so whoever checked didn't see it as available on there.
So the shop dude said, now we just have to wait til the laptop gets delivered.
I went home and rang the customer service dude cause he had said in the mail he was waiting for a reply from me. So I called, quicker.
I told him it was sorted, that the new laptop was coming. And he said that was news to him. So I told him there actually was one laptop left and it was ordered for me. He also said that the contract doesn't need to be ended, that the laptop would just be replaced. He said he'd call the shop for clarification and call me back.
So he called me back and said, they will just replace the laptop and no contract needs to be ended. So I told him we already did the contract thing and he said he'd call the shop and stop the contract annulment. I asked him like what was gonna happen now and he said that I just have to go to the shop and pick up the laptop when it arrives and don't have to do anything else.
Then!
Yesterday I called the shop to check if the laptop had arrived yet (cause as experience has shown, they don't contact me when they say they will). It hadn't. And the shop dude was going on about the annulment of the contract, like we have to wait for it or something. I didn't pay any mind to it cause I was told, I don't have to do anything and nothing will be annulled (by customer service).
Then today I discovered mum had received a confirmation of the annulment of the contract on her email. PLUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have to pay 8 euros for the annulment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the actual fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I don't have a laptop AND I have to pay 8 euros extra to them for it. !?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!!??!?!?!?!?!?!
Like, why are the shop and customer service telling me and doing completely opposite things!?!?!?!?!? I will NOT pay that money, cause I was told the annulment of the contract is not necessary and the annullment will be annulled. If they didn't do it and went ahead and annulled my fucking contract it's on them, they need to pay it, not me.
Fuuuuuuuckckckckck! I just want a fucking working laptop!!!!!!!!! Why is it so fucking difficult!?!?!?!??!!??!!?
I will call both, the shop and that damn customer service dude, tomorrow and chew their fucking heads off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lip smacking

Okay, I've been reading up about my reading problems. Some scary stuff is out there, don't think I have them serious problems. If it gets worse or persists I'm going to the doctor. Although, I did read about long time olanzapine side effects and I saw lip smacking was on the list!!!! I legit have that. Not as in, oh I read it might be and I do it so I must have it. I legit do it all the time, so much that my lips are dry and have to use lip balm all the time. I never knew it was cause of olanzapine. I had no idea why I'm doing it but now I know. This is insane lol. Lip smaking? Seriously!? I've started doing it in the past six months. Good thing is, I'm on 1,25mg dosage every other day and looks like I might get off of it altogether this time.

Yeah and my laptop saga isn't ending anytime soon it seems. Yeah, Miranda is definitely gone. Out of my life. Forever.
I was told by the customer service I can just get a new laptop, go into shop, pick it up and go home. But the shop sings a different song. Have to do new contracts and shit. Ughhhh!!!

Should I be worried?

Okay, I woke up early today cause I was too excited about getting a new laptop today. Which I probably won't cause... why would I get what I want!?

Yeah, what got me writing is this... for a while now, think it's only been this year, I read things wrong. Like when I read stuff on the internet, be it on social media or news or whatever. It's really noticable and annoying cause I need to reread a sentence soooo many times. Like, my brain sees words that are not there. Right now there was a sentence that started with "Mother Nature..." and I saw "More Nature...". Like why does my brain invent these words!?!? It happens all the time, several times a day. And when the sentence doesn't, obviously, make sense to me I have to read it several, several times again, before my brain sees what's actually written. It happens both in english and in estonian. Should I be worried? Is it the pills I'm taking? I get enough sleep. I'm not more distracted than usually, before.