Sorry fly

Yeah I just killed that annoying fly. Sorry fly. I so randomly killed it with the back of my hand, finger to be precise.

half confident

I felt half confident today and it made me happy. I haven't been to the big shop, Rimi, across the road from my house in about 7 months. I had Ilme buy me food cause I got really bad anxiety when in shop cause it's too big. Big open spaces scare me. Anyway, today I went to Rimi all by myself. I only bought an ice tea so I was in and out real quick but still. It gave me such confidence and happiness. :)

Oh and I don't think I started my periods again, it's just heavy spotting. Weird anyway... to be a woman!

Ughh...and I hate it how it's gone all warm out and all sorts of insects are flying about. Have this annoying fly flying around the lamp in my room, which happens to be right behind my head.

Oh and this dude who half raped me a couple of years ago or so wanted to hang out and have sex with me again. Never!

my bodily functions

That's a first - I'm lactating. And I started my period today. About ten days after my "normal" period. It's probably the only time I'm gonna experience lactation since I have no plans to have a baby of my own (gonna adopt). Anyway, I'm kinda disturbed by my bodily functions.

Plus I have this: http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/1278523-overview?src=emailthis#a1 to translate into Estonian for my stepmother, father's wife, Irina. I only have the Overview translated.

Unlock

What drama! I came to town today and I didn't lock up my bike when I came home cause I was gonna go out to the shop. So I left home again and didn't lock the apartment door and it totally slipped my mind that I hadn't locked up my bike, meaning I didn't need to unlock it. And because I didn't lock the apartment door nor did I unlock my bike, I forgot I didn't take my keys with me. So I went to the shop, before going in I locked my bike to a bus stop sign. When I came out the shop I was like "wtf, where are me keys!? I've lost my keys!" And I couldn't unlock my bike. I was desperately looking for my keys, in my pockets and my bag, but no luck. Luckily though, there were some workmen standing nearby so I went up to them and told them I had lost my keys and needed my bike lock chain to be cut. As said, so done. Then all the way home I was pondering about the keys. When I got home Ilme let me in. I then found out I had left my keys home.
Now I needed to get my bike lock chain to be fixed. I needed one of the rings in the chain to be more round so that I could slip the padlock through it. Yeah, me and Ilme were too weak for that so went downstairs, to the second floor, to an apartment that had a family living in it. Ilme said, there was a man in there. So I had to explain why I needed a man. Luckily the man didn't mind and rounded up the ring for me. So everything got sorted.
Gahhh!
I was so hot riding to town. Looks like spring has arrived. It was dry and warm, sunny but didn't feel quite springy just yet.


TS25022014

I knew

Gahhhh!!! I can never be happy. I knew when I was writing my previous post that I'd have a crappy evening and I do. I have stomach troubles and my mother's man too. Hopefully it's not some stomach flu business, that it's the pomelo I ate. Although my mother's man didn't. Ughhhhhh!

What great family day!

What great family day! Hung out with my fam for hours and nobody had a fight or anything. Hopefully the evening will be as pleasant.

Mmm... I love latte

Mmm... I love latte. Too bad it kicks up the anxiety.

Scares me but I like it

Ahhhh, I feel so happy! A girl on my forum helped me with the menu for the the new forum's look and it's sorted. It's not perfect but it's sorted.
And.... how good is Lea Michele's new song!? I'm loving it so much although it sounds eerie. Especially the chorus. Scares me but I like it.

so frustrating and saddening

So the girls on my forum want a new look for it. Started designing one today... Ahh, it's so frustrating and saddening that I can't get the menu right. Blahhh!!!

My apologies to Mother Nature

I must say I loved this winter we had this year. There was hardly any snow and it was relatively warm, with the exception of January. I know I complained about it but I was just living in fear of cold snowy winter. My apologies to Mother Nature.

logic and intuition

*grunt*

Someone posted this on Tumblr. :D
Makes me wanna watch the show again, eventhough I just finished watching all 8 seasons.

men, here I am!

Okay, I gotta get laid. I tried to be nice and live up to the promise I made to my mother - no more sleeping around. But it's not doing me any good so... men, here I am!

my bad

Happy Valentine's Day! It didn't start that happily for me though. Mother rang me and told me not to come to her place today. Said she and her man had had a fight about me. Told me to come over to her workplace cause she didn't wanna talk about it on the phone. Yeah, I was sort of dreading it, thought I was in for a lecture about money, health and job and stuff. The thing is...I forgot to close the window when I left my mother's place on monday and it had been open all week. :D Phew! I thought it was something serious. I mean... I wouldn't necessarily approve of leaving the window open for the whole week so...my bad...but it's just so....I don't even know. There's always issues with me and leaving the windows open. This time I can see why he was mad though.

I don't go by Doowally anymore

Oh my. I found a way to get access to all of my blog images. And I found this cutie pie:

Ahhh, I love this header so much. Too bad I don't go by Doowally anymore. Maybe one day again I will...

It's not a gay parade

Ugh, I just hate the way media is trying to make Russia look silly cause of the Olympics.
And I hate this whole gay thing. It's not a gay parade, it's the Olympics. If you wanna flaunt your homosexuality go to a gay bar, not a sports event. I don't normally side with Russia but they're only trying to do their best at hosting the event. My half-Russian blood is boiling!

should be... social

I'm at my mother's place. And man, is it cold over here!? I mean inside. The whole upstairs is freezing! This weekend should be... social. As in socializing with a bunch of people. Apparently my mother's brother, my uncle then, is coming over aswell as my mother's friend. Hopefully this means we don't have to work on our chopped down fir tree then.

in the same boat

Poor Great Britain. What with the floods and all. And looks like Ireland is in the same boat. No pun intended.

too heavy and serious

Watched Never Let Me go yesterday. Yeah I don't like Keira Knightley. (I also don't like Zooey Deschanel, Jennifer Garner, Rachel McAdams and Emmy Rossum). And I cannot take films seriously when the people speak British english. I guess I'm too used to Hollywood stuff.
I definitely wouldn't watch it again since it's too heavy and serious. And a bit confusing. I didn't understand who the Originals were.

Yeah and I had this very lovey dovey dream about Jonathan. Ahhh..if only it were reality!


TS05022014

I lied

Mh, okay I lied to my mother. Told her I went to the interview. Actually, before I decided not to go I thought of going there with my mother. And today she said she would have loved to have gone with me. Damn, maybe I would have been able to go then. Ugh!

it's been pretty dead

Okay, today I was supposed to have my job interview but last night I gave into my anxiety and decided not to go. I haven't told my mother yet so I'm worried about that.
Ugh! Luckily the weather has been warmer so I might be able to go to my mother's place, Melliste, this weekend. I'd like to go there already on Thursday. We'll see.
Yeah and I'm feeling all poo poo at the minute. Think it's cause I might start my period tomorrow.

Oh and on my forum we started this new thing, film club. We also have a book club but I obviously won't be taking part in that. Hmm...maybe I should. Have to renew my library card, it had expired the last time I went to the library.
Anyway, back to film club.
The first film we watched was Triple Dog.

I gave it 7,5 out of ten. Brittany Robertson is hot. Although her character is majorly annoying. And I didn't undertsand as to why she would play the game again when she was still upset and feeling regret about playing it before what with the girl drowning and all. Yeah I thought I'd write the reviews on my blog aswell cause you never know when the forum will be over since it's been pretty dead lately. Anyways...yeah...I'm off.

gonna have long days

Mhh...I'm so stressed about the job interview on Monday. I went to my mother's workplace today to get some money off her and told her I have it. Luckily she didn't say anything. I haven't told Ilme about it yet and won't.
Ughhh, I'm just so paranoid. About the fact that I might actually get the job. It's gonna be such a huge adjustment and it's gonna take forever to get used to. I'm gonna have long days of feeling nauseous and like I'm gonna pass out.