Diagnosis

Was diagnosed with a reflux disease.
Based on the barium meal so.
Have to take pills for the rest of my life.
Not to heal the condition, but to ease the symptoms.
There's no remedy - have an anatomical problem which can't be fixed even with an operation.
Bascially the food pipe muscles are too weak to hold the food and acid in my stomach, so I get heartburn, discomfort, pain, gagging throughout the day, every day...for the rest of my life.
I swear to...something super-important sometimes I want to get out of my body so much.

Plus, the sex this morning is giving me tummy troubles.:(
Could be the chinese I had last night that's making my tummy ache.
Well, it gave a bad stomach to my boyfriend.
Hmh, not fun, especially if you don't have toilet paper in the house.:D

Oh, I have been using this beauty lamp for spots on my face.
Skin looks better or different but it's only early days.
Got my tooth fixed. Good stuff. Was really proud of myself for not being nervous or scared of the dentist.

Just an update for myself with appointments...again:
2nd of October at 18:00 hypnotherapist
Breath test - Wednesday 11th November 2009 at 09:00
psychiatrist on 17th November 2009
Dr. at hospital - Wednesday 16/12/2009 at 15:30
January 2009 lady doctor
March 2009 dentist check up

Blah, nothing interesting so. Just health stuff.

The inner girl

Woohoo, went out.
Was kind of boring and felt a bit icky. But!
I didn't really dress up or make an effort.
Until I got to my friend's house.
She has like fuckloads of shoes and dresses/skirts/tops etc.
And they were all gorgeous!!!
I've never been the one to make a fuss about all that stuff but it was just too colourful and glitzy not to get excited.
So I went through my friend's press (read: treasure chest) and put together loadsa different outfits and had the girly panic where I didn't know what to wear.

Anyway, I went for this top, skirt ( front/back), the lovely shoes (friend got them for Christmas, so she calls them Snowflake Shoes). And that's little old me (fuzzy, I know. Friend took it with my phone. She had a date comin' up, so was nervous).

Yeah, went out so, talked to some airport man.
Didn't get into a nightclub, cause I didn't have my ID with me.
God, I'm nearly 24!!
Friend liked her date. Seemed like a nice guy.

Wing man

Went to have the barium meal done so.
Wasn't too bad, but had a sore throat at the time and the mix irritated it.
Didn't have anxiety management, just talked to my psychiatrist.
He was surprised I hadn't had any of those sessions since the last time we met.
Um, yeah mate, you're the one who's managing the whole thing.
Told my friend I tried to kill myself - she found a counsellor for me and is paying for sessions, cause she doesn't want to organize my funeral.
First time - 2nd October 2009 at 18:00
Plus
GP Monday 28th September 10:30 (getting the results of barium meal)
Dentist on Monday 28th September 10:45 or 13:45
(Damn a sweet destroyed my tooth - it just fell apart)
Seeing the psychiatrist on 17th November 2009 (Yes, on my birthday)
Breath test - Wednesday 11th November 2009 at 09:00
Dr. at hospital - Wednesday 16/12/2009 at 15:30

Blah - haven't seen my boyfriend for quite a while.
The last time I saw him (Sunday) I wasn't in pain.;):D

Should go out tonight.
To be a wing man to my friend - she's meeting a lad for the first time and is nervous.
Not in the mood to blog really, just a few updates for myself.

Oh and I started taking a few spoonfuls of Extra Virgin olive oil daily. Think it's helping a bit.
And I'm eating baby food instead of normal food. Everything else just makes me feel poo-y.

Thumbs down

Feeling shitty.
Finished my Mastika capsules, Pantup and Manuka honey a few days ago.
So, going back to feeling sick constantly.

Watchmen

Boyfriend came over last night.
Finally watched the film Watchmen.
Didn't really like it. Best bit was naked Dr. Manhattan.
Other than that - forgettable.

Some days ago I bought What Happens In Vegas and The Devil Wears Prada (only cause they were the best choices in the 5 euro a film section).
Vegas was kinda crappy - was expecting something better from of Cameron and Ashton.
Prada wasn't too bad - Meryl Streep is a super good actress and Anne Hathaway is a very good looking girl.
Oh and a friend gave her DVD to watch - The Red Violin. Now that's a different film. I would actually recommend it.

Yeah that's about it.

Oh, have to keep track of my pains for the lady doctor - no pains during the two rides last night.:) Haha!

Wings

Jesus, what a day.
I feel like such a rookie when it comes to periods even though I've been having them for a decade.
I've been leaking 'bucketfuls' cause I can't afford pads with wings.
I don't support tampons - they're scarily bacterial infection-friendly.

Had to come home twice when out on town to change trousers.
Went to Social Welfare with my doctor's cert. Money's on it's way!
Talked to my boyfriend last night. He rang me.
I texted him 'No' as a reply to 'Are you OK?'
Damn, I miss him.
Once again he doesn't seem to understand it.
Said I must be crying cause I'm 'bored or something'.
Ugh. Sure.

I can't believe I missed yet another appointment. Was for thyroid x-ray.
So, just a note for myself with upcoming appointments:
Barium meal - Monday 21/09/2009 at 09:30
Anxiety management - 22/09/09 at 10.00 or 10.45
Breath test - Wednesday 11th November 2009 at 09:00
Dr. at hospital - Wednesday 16/12/2009 at 15:30
(Plus hopefully a new appointment for thyroid and a meeting with a woman who heals with hands)

(TE)

Rubbish

God, I hate drugs!
Okay, I'm supposed to be taking tranquilizers and antidepressants - legal drugs, like.
I'm supposed to take them to heal my sick head.
I just don't understand how people can use that illegal crap for fun, like.
Means they're sick in the head all the time.
Selfish bastards - I'll never support anyone who's trying to quit.
Their drug-taking isn't the issue, it's their stupidity.
And it's so not my or anyone else's but the fucker's problem that they didn't educate themselves.

And I just found out someone close to me has been taking drugs recently.
I knew that they have in the past, but...yeah ...major disappointment.

Bloody

Right so.
Was supposed to start my periods next week around the 18th.
Went to see the lady doctor today.
'Hop on the table,' said the doctor as I took my pants down and went, 'Oh no, I started my period!'
Oh well, could be the reason of painful pleasure.
Have to keep track of pains for 4 months then go back.
If I notice any pattern in between I can take painkillers before riding.
Like I plan that kinda thing!
Well, a good start would be with me - check, my man - er...
Wherever he is. Haven't been able to talk to him, since he's too busy.
Doesn't even reply my texts. Whatever.

Oh and I'm wondering what to do with the barium meal appointment.
I was supposed to ring them on the first day of my period, but only from Monday 'til Friday.
Oops, I kinda started on a forbidden day.


Besides waiting for a reply from my boyfriend all day, I also went for a walk.
Mm...I just love the countryside.
If there hadn't been sheep poo and thistles, it would have been perfect.
Super sunny and hot out - wore a tank top sort of a top.
About a week ago I was walking around with a woolly jacket and a scarf.


TS12

Recipe

Okay, I wrote and saved a draft (a small part of my last post) on 28th of August, but I posted my last update a few minutes ago. ;)

Anyway, I'm an incredibly crappy cook. But I did prepare something lovely a few days ago.

Right so - I don't know where people might get them things I used but if you live somewhere where there's Tesco, you're in luck. Ha! :D They sell them stir-fry pouches/packets.

Anyway, what you need:
Stir-fry green beans
Stir-fry green peas
Baby corn
Bean sprouts
Mushrooms (Champignons)
Knorr's White sauce
Big Al's roast chicken fillet (add flavour by using Schwartz' or Santa Maria's seasoning for chicken)
(You can cook potatoes with it aswell)

Stir fry the veg, cook the chicken in the oven. When the veg is done, put the sauce on it and cook it for a few minutes. Make sure there's more of the veg than the sauce (it's just yummier).
Yeah, when it's done...you're done. Bon appetit!

Very simple and not much of a recipe, but I liked it a lot.