no clue what is going on

Ok, have no clue what is going on. Started feeling super dizzy at work, or like I was gonna pass out. Have anxiety now and little passing out feeling. Am I sick? Do I need more antipsychotic? Like...what? Ughh, don't wanna up my dose.

I thought I was over this. Guess not

Ugh. I thought I was over this. Guess not. Took a pill on Monday morning at 7am. Olanzapine of course. By the time I got to work I was spotting again. Fuck! And I've been up all night lately aswell. Took the pill then and I slept til 15:30. So it's obviously the pill that's causing my insomnia aswell. Ughhhh!

all I've done is die

Started my period today. Took a 1000mg of paracetamol and a no spa. Not even an ounce less pain! Fuck! Should have taken ibuprofen straight away. I thought since it makes you bleed more I shouldn't take it when on period but fuck... I'd rather bleed more than have this pain. I mean it's not gonna make me bleed to death ffs. Now I have to wait a few hours to take it and suffer through til that time. Tried to take a nap but someone was drilling something or...something.
The upside is, my mum's man came over today to help me put together the bed my landlord bought me. It's a long story, dunno if blogged before, but my back didn't want to let me sleep on the old bed so the landlord ended up buying a new one for me. Mum's man said it doesn't look like a very sturdy bed so hopefully it doesn't collapse when I'm in it.
Yesterday was super though. I worked at two places. Went in to my regular job to do extra work, for free. I just felt so productive yesterday. Thought of leaving one place for today but I was already spotting yesterday and I thought I'd start properly today and would be dying today and was right. So luckily I did everything yesterday. Today all I've done is die.
Should be better tomorrow.

TS5112017

Can I have it every night?

Yeah yeah I know I have the dream page but I had a dream I had sex with Matthew Gray Gubler and then with Shemar Moore. To my... dismay maybe?... Moore was better. Fuck! :D Gubler's the babe though. Great dream though. Can I have it every night?

I want a kid

My mom sent me this video of my 2 year old niece jentree watching a movie and crying because the dinosaur fell and lost his mom...my heart 😭 pic.twitter.com/sztF9ihQC9

— m (@emilybroderick) September 19, 2017

Waaah, I want to be pregnant now! I want a kid for myself. Look at how cute she is. I want one for myself.