I wish Kevin McHale got a new job.

Saw Glee the other day.
The Britney episode.
Well, what can you expect?
Rubbish.
And rubbish was delivered.
It was really like...nothing so I don't even have anything to say.
I wish Kevin McHale got a new job.

Oh, I baked yesterday.
Nothing really turned out that nice but whatever.
Made a salad, it doesn't have any flavour.

Made a cake and it tastes like a sugared fried egg.

And I made some cheese/paprika sticks.
Those aren't as bad but they're not the best.

Oh well.

Gahh, I'm freezing!
It's so cold out.
I'm so not used to this kind of cold.
I thought my winter coat was warm but I seriously need to get something warmer.

some bastard person has stolen some of my clothes

Okay, some bastard person has stolen some of my clothes.
I know for a fact I didn't leave the things in Ireland.
Seriously, whoever stole my stuff - go die!

Right, off for a walk now.
It's getting colder and colder.
At least it's sunny today.

Will take a camera with me, maybe take some pics :)

Get the fuck over yourself. RIGHT NOW!

Seriously, how do people live with their fathers?!
I totally feel like I wanna hang myself.
I never thought a man could be this dramatic.
Like, seriously, get the fuck over the window business!!!
I need to sleep with the window open - cause otherwise I get a headache and start feeling sick.
I need fresh air all the time.
And then my father developed this idiotic habit of marching into my room at three o'clock at night to close my window.
WHAT THE FUCK!?
Stay in your damn room and fucking sleep!

Like, last night he came into my room again and I was like, "Don t close it, there's no point, cause I'll open it again. I can't sleep with the window closed".
And then he s like, "Whine, whine whine, it s cold and raining outside. If it was summer then it would be okay".
The FUCK it would be!
When I shared the room with him in summer, I kept the balcony door open and he kept complaining about flies and knats flying in and biting him.

Jaysas fucking christ!

I'm so close to losing my mind!

The fucking universe does NOT revolve around you, for shit's sake.
Get the fuck over yourself. RIGHT NOW!

I'm seriously doubting taking my final exams again.
I have to get a job and find my own place for living cause I swear I'll kill myself living with these kinds of people.
Plus, last night I had to sleep in kitchen cause the father wouldn't stop being dramatic over the window.

Fucking shit!

This and that and a little Glee - Auditions review

Hm. Think it was yesterday when I went to the garden with my father.
I normally wouldn't spend time with him, but I wanted to play the violin.
So, he brought me there in his car.
We have this little cottage thingy in the garden so I was playing in there.
I just don't wanna be all loud and wrong in the apartment.

So, then I've been busy with my forum.
Trying to get a few gadgets on it and it's so damn hard cause it just doesn't work or look like how I want it.
Gahh. So much time and effort for nothing.

Oh and then I saw the first season two episode of Glee.
Yeah, let the cheesefest begin.
Finn is just so terribly cheesy, it's sickening.
They should totally change the character or get a new actor for him cause the current actor/character is doomed.
There were about 3 bits I liked in the episode.
One was the little catfight between Quinn and Santana.
Well, the Quinn character is annyoing aswell so I would have liked it if Santana had kicked her butt.
Santana's the bitch!
Then I liked the bit were Sue came into the bathroom where Rachel and the Asian girl were singing and she was like, "Shut up!"
I mean, I think the writers and people are kind of starting to get the idea of what people think of the show.


Oh and in the beginning they were kind of giving out about people dissing Glee in their blogs and then the Merzedes girl was, like "Blah blah, were a family and nothing can break us". Yeah, you're as tight family as different pieces of cheese on a cheese platter.
I'd have no problem telling those people they're show is crap.
Well, I wouldn't tell Kevin that. To him I'd just say, "Let's ride"

And the third nice bit in the episode was the new Asian girl.
I hope she will be in the show in the next episodes aswell.
I liked how she was smiling all the time.
Well, I kind of thought of it as smirking.
At the whole show like. :D

Yeah, that is about it. My head is all over the place at the minute.

Vintage white

So, I had my second violin lesson in Estonia today.
I think the teacher spends too much time playing the violin. :D
I mean I'm the one who's learning there so I should be playing most of the time.
So a while ago my stepmum bought this little thingy for me that was suppose to mellow or quieten the violin.
It mellowed it a bit yeah, but it's still loud as ever.

So, I decided to buy an electric violin.
Just cause you need an amp to play it loud and when you don't have an amp, it doesn't really make that much sound at all.
I'm gonna buy the thing in an Estonian shop I think.

I just need to figure out where I'm gonna get the money for it.
My mother already gave me quite a bit of money for my laptop.
I had about 7 thousand with my mum's and my own money.
Then my dad and stepmum threw in 4 thousand.
And they all pretty much said it's for my birthday.

I mean, if anyone's feeling randomly generous, send in your cheques. :D

Well, Da and stepmum said it's like a half sort of thing.
So what's another three thousand then? :D

Yeah, I only want a cheap little thing cause I'm not good enough for a good violin.
Although the teacher said my violin sounds better than his.

Anyway, me and the teacher were looking at some electric violins so and I kinda like this one:

Vintage white

It's all white and cute.

Another one I liked was this one:

Yellow

It looks a bit fancy pants with one of the top bits gone and all. I'm thinking maybe it's a bit too edgy looking for me.

I've never bought an electric violin before or any electric instrument so I don't know what to look out for.
The white one's got active pick-up system. I'm not sure what the difference is between an active system and a passive one. And it says it has "aux in way", whatever that means.

The yellow one's got "bass, treble, volume". Dunno how they come out when playing but I'll take them please if they're included in the price.

Yeah, found a few more interesting violins:

Loe the green! Hate the spots. I wouldn't buy an instrument that was coloured that though.

Lovely pattern.

This one is a lefthanded violin. How weird. I'm left handed and all but I can't imagine playing the violin the other way round.
There's a whole bunch of amazing looking and by the information given amazing sounding violins but they're way too pricey. Maybe one day when I'm like..when I have reached the level of good violinist.
Here's another electric violin, a dear one:

This one is an absolutely gorgeous looking violin:

*sigh*

How I wish I could own one of those fancy violins and how I wish I could play really really well.

The teacher said I need to practice bowing. I move my shoulder too much which makes the bow slip.
Blah.
Plus, this I feel myself, I have trouble understanding and playing a tune by the same rhythm all the way from the beginning to the end.

Oh and I meant to post about it a few days ago but forgot. Iäve been watching all those "Who's the next top model" shows. And god, some people are evil. Those bitches should be eliminated straight away.

And the other day, was a massive baking day. Me and stepmum baked rye bread.
It's all healthy and stuff.
And I made my cookies again.
Yum.
Oh and I'm getting the hang of chemistry.

Just busy writing stuff.
Picking out the important bits, out of books like and writing them down.
I can't like write the stuff, I have to type it all cause my hand gets so sore when writing.
I haven't had the need to write so much in years so I write enough in classes.
At home, I type.

If you wanna fuck about, do it on your own time, you fuckface!

Gahhh, I hate slow internet connection.

Seriously!

Why the fuck do I have to wait for ten minutes or more for a page to load?!

If you wanna fuck about, do it on your own time, you fuckface!

When I'm on internet I don't wanna hear about any damn problems of yours.

When I need to get something done I need to get something done.

Internet connection is such a shitty cunt!

For real, like!

be all pubertious with your family

Today was another lame day.

When it comes to my dad, that is.

He just has to make everything a problem.

It's unreal, like.

I will never be the kind of daughter he wants me to be.

He just needs to accept it.

Other than that I finally got the new look for my forum done.

Wow, what long few weeks I had creating it.

Plus, some girls decided to go all puberty-mad on me.

Seriously, I don't care your hormones are messed up.

If you're posting crap on my forum you're banned, you can be all pubertious with your family, I don't need that shit (and neither do the stable members of the forum). I'm not your damn mother so behave!

I'll deal with it once I have my own kids.

But all the hormone filled nervous breakdowns (on the teenage girls' part on my forum) aside I like my forum.

I was just doing a proper clean out in my mailbox:

I had fifty fucking-seven-pages of messages.

I got most of them deleted. This was left:

 Phew!

The other day there was a Disney film on or some film of the sort.

Was with the Jonas Brothers and Demi Lovato.

I was so sure Miley Cyrus was gonna be in the film aswell. :D

Well, Demi Lovato is such a great singer.

I like her a lot.

As for the Jonas Brothers - hmm.

I really don't know if you can call it singing.

I don't hate the Jonas Brothers but they kinda just grunt and puff and wail.

It kind of reminds me of oinking.

And the main guy - I cannot remember his name at this point - I'm thinking of Tom but I know it's not it - he looks weird performing.

Like, he looks okay I guess and you wouldn't think a guy who looks like that sounds and moves like he does.

I'm rooting for the young curly haired one.

He's decent.

And judging by pictures of tehm I though the Kevin guy would be decent, but he was the weirdest in the film.

Anyway, Demi Lovato's voice was great, everything else was crap.

I mean can't they really think of any better plot for the film other than "I lost the competition, but won in life".

As Michael Kelso said, "Who wants to watch a film with a message like that?"

The other week there was a film with Hilary Duff in it and it was exactly the same.

The difference was that she can't sing like Demi.

Yeah so I started blabbing about Disney stuff and forgot why I started writing my blog in the first place.

Oh well.

Oh oh I just remembered.

It was about my forum.

So I deleted a bunch of emails and I got to read some of the emails that were sent to me when I opened the forum.

That was like almost a year ago.

And we were promoting the forum on this other forum and the moderators there deleted all posts that had tmy forum's address in it so people started emailing me asking for my forum's address.

Ahh, good old times. There was no hassle or anything.

I totally wanna woman up.

I think I might develope OCD of some sort soon.

I m washing my hands a hundred times a day.

And I m doing it cause it s so damn cold - need to keep my hands warm.

When do they think it s time to get the heating working? In spring?

Blah.

There was a fair in town yesterday.

Me and stepmum bought some plants - flowers and two bushes.

I had to dig two holes in the ground.

Was so out of breath and tired.

I m so unfit.

But really - what s working out all about anyway?

When I work out, I only move myself til the point where I start sweating (I hardly ever reach that point).

Like, what s so beneficial about sweating while running at the same spot?

Plus, my body needs fat.

I mean I gotta look appetizing as a mate. :D

Oh and the other day, when I was unpacking a suitcase full of clothes, I was like, ""Damn, I have so many clothes, how come I never have anything to wear".

And I was talking about clothes to my stepmum and she said there is a saying about men and women and it goes like this: When a woman has nothing to wear it means she has no new clothes. When a man has nothing to wear it means he has no clean clothes.

And I can totally relate to the saying about women. I was just thinking that. I have enough clothes to wear a different outfit every day for about two weeks. Yet I feel like I have nothing to wear. I just need to refreshen my wardrobe once in a while.

And while I m not one for style and clothes I really really do feel like buying a little something. And right now I m thinking of buying shoes and skirts.

I totally wanna woman up.

Another thing.

I have to make a schedule of studying stuff.

Like, biology on mondays and tuesdays and geography on wednesdays and thursdays or so.

Gah, I don t know how I ll do it yet.

Sordine

I had a really bad pain in my right side ovary last night.

Had to take a painkiller.

Weird.

Also got the pain this morning and throughout the night.

That's why I didn't go to chemistry class this morning.

Had my first violin lesson aswell.

In Estonia like.

I'm not sure what to make of the teacher though.

He is kind of... weird.

Hopefully will get along well.

My stepmum went to... a bigger town just now.

Hopefully she'll buy a sordine for my violin then I can start practicing.

How come I didn't know about this little piece before?!

Playing Away In A Manger.

Fail much?

I'm not happy with Geography classes.

I cannot write as fast as the teacher is talking about stuff.

And the things she says are kind of... not thorough.

I cannot study stuff like this when I don't understand half the things in the sentence.

Like when there is a term, the explanation to it is a little description.

It doesn't say what the thing is and doesn't thoroughly describe the thing so everything is kind of half arsed.

Plus, if there is an explanation the words in it are the kind of words I've never heard before and the teacher doesn't explain the meaning of the them.

Plus, for god knows what stupid reason there are no books for the 11th year.

I mean like what the fuck!?

I have no idea how I'm supposed to study for the exam if there's nothing to study from.

Today, there was supposed to be a test in Geography.

I was gonna tell the teacher that I wasn't going to do the test.

Yeah, but I never got to, cause I couldn't find my key.

That means I couldn't leave the house.

I would've gone and leave the door unlocked but the door was locked already so I couldn't even open it.

Hahahaaa.

Fail much?

Having a dick doesn't mean you're "the man", it can very well mean you're just full of junk

So, some people are impossible to talk to.

They either boss you around or don't say anything to you at all.

I was supposed to go collect one of my suitcaes today.

The one that I sent to Estonia before my flight.

And when I'm almost there I get a phone call from my father saying he already has the thing.

Like, is it so goddamn hard to tell me you're going to collect the damn thing!?

Seriously!

I'm absolutely not talking to him unless I really really have to.

Like, today would have been one of those "really really have to" moments, but he totally failed to communicate.

Gah!

Seriously, some men need to get over the fact that they have man business.

Having a dick doesn't mean you're "the man", it can very well mean you're just full of junk.

At least I got my violin back.

I talked to the music teacher at the local school and I can start taking lessons there.

It'll be about 120 moneys a month.

That is very cheap!

I used to pay about the same amount for just one lesson.

I'm hungry

I'm hungry.

Seriously, that Jenna girl needs to learn some manners - sharing is caring!

And you don't ask a man for his opinion, you just do him.

Plus, hm... I might drum me up some romantic business.

I was thinking maybe a girl this time.

Men don't really excite me much at the minute.

Or maybe it's just cause I'm really bored.

Can't even be bothered to play the sims.

Blahhh... can't wait til the dinner is ready.

Mushrooms!

TE09092010

Dannnggg!

Dannnggg!

pretty women singing

Just seen a few videos of pretty women singing.

You know, there's jobs other than singing in show business!
My strongest suggestions!

Becoming a feminist

So, I really cannot stand some things about men.

Why do women get paid less when they're doing the same (amount of) job as men?
Just because a person is male doesnt's necessarily mean they do more than a person who is female.
Plus, most women go home after work and unlike men who get to relax, they need to start cooking, cleaning, washing the dishes and clothes and other things. So, there's no end to working when it comes to women.
And here's the thing I hate most - men thinking it's a woman's obligation to do it all.
Like what the fuck?
If you're such a big tough man, do things yourself not get your woman to do things for you.
Seriously.
Like this morning, my father entered the room and was like, "Why didn't you cook breakfast?"
And I was like, "I wasn't hungry."
Like, why the hell do I have to make the breakfast?!
If you're hungry, make breakfast yourself.
And then he was like, "Why didn't you clean up the kitchen last night?"
And I was like, "Why didn't you?"
Then he was like, "Okay, I'll get the wife to do it when she wakes up."
I was like, "Pfft... women aren't slaves, you know."
Then after a while he came back to me and said, "Thanks for helping," all sarcastically.
And I'm thinking it's not helping when you have to do everything for someone.
Helping is when the person does something and you're doing a few bits here and there for them.
When talking about helping then he thinks he's the doer, but everyone else has to do things.
But he really is the "helper" who thinks helping washing the dishes is creating dirty dishes to wash.
So... what is he?
Plus, the title itsel - Doer - isn't much worth if the person doesn't do anything (/earn the title).

I'm not saying I'm a doer but there is no way I will ever be doing stuff like that for men.
I can do it with them.
I will never be taken for granted like this.

And I will never ever marry anyone.
A wedding is just a lure (with it's white pretty dress and flowers) to a horrible horrible trap of slavery.
Luckily for me, I'm not one for all that girly stuff so... thanks but no thanks.

And as I'm writing this, my father came into the room again and said there's a big pile of dirty dishes left (I cleaned some already, mostly my own).
And I said he can wash those himself and he asked me if I was tired already (sarcastically again).
And I said no and what is wrong with him that he can't wash them.
He just walked off.

Seriously!!!

I loathe this kind of attitude.


And another thing I hate is when men think women have to please them sexually all the time.
Like when a man is horny and the woman is not, she has to get him off.
They're like, "Oh for God's sake, it's not hard to do a blowjob or a handjob, it'll take a few minutes only."
And I'm like yeah, a handjob takes a few minutes only and you have two hands, do it yourself.
And then men justify their cheating with that - that their own woman doesn't want sex.
It's completely normal not to want sex.
And I agree that is completely normal to want sex.
I don't think it's normal to force someone to do sexual things when they don't feel like it.
And everyone's sexuality is their own responisibility.
If you want sex, you figure out how to get it.
It is not the woman's fault when a man cheats on her cause he wasn't getting any from her.
It is not the man's fault either, but it is his choice and responsibility.
He can either control his urges or give into them.
No one has ever died from lack of sex so it isn't vital.

I will see her little baby

Whoop.

My friend will come over to my place tomorrow and I will see her little baby.

:)

Baked the cookies last night so.

Left some for tomorrow as well.

For my friend.

And my stepmum made a cake for tomorrow as well.

Ahh yeah...been playing sims quite a bit.

Had to reinstall it a few times as usual.

It's working okay at the minute.

Almost.

TS030910

Pea soup and cookies

Cooked pea soup last night for the first time.

Was quite tasty actually.

Today I'm gonna bake cookies.

Gah, have to finish my forum, but I'm kind of nervous cause it's such a big change.

Don't wanna fuck up anything and then have to fix it. :(

First day of school is officially over.

Phew!

First day of school is officially over.

First was biology.

Fifth and sixth chemistry.

My head is in bits cause of chemistry.

It's so damn confusing and I don't remember anything.

I was having second thoughts about taking the exam but the teacher said that when studying biology or working in that field I need chemistry as well. So... I have to really try.

I haven't checked the whole week yet but I know I have tomorrow off.

No classes.

Maybe I'll have time to redecorate my forum.

Finally.

The new look is more or less done so...

Just have to transfer it over to the forum.

Yeah... off to cook now.

Brother's finished as well  and no one else is home so I have to be the mother for a while.

Oh and damn! I hate un-scheduled water... er cuts.

I can't wash the dishes or anything and my father's home soon so he will give out to me again for not cleaning the place.